"Crap! I wish I hadn't seen Ricky on the sidewalk."

"You will be fine for 31 minutes. You will be dead in 32 minutes."

Monday, July 15, 2013


I've spent more time in Home Depot in the last two weeks than I have in the last six years. I'm a goddamned regular over there. 

It's like Norm entering the bar on Cheers, except nobody's very happy to see me. The employees all spin around and start walking the other way when I show up. They take early lunches and extended breaks.

I really can't blame Home Depot because I have nothing but silly questions and occasionally some returns. A tan faceplate instead of white, an extra paintbrush.

Getting the house ready to sell was more than packing up my belongings, more than cleaning bathrooms and baseboards, more than dusting furniture. It meant spackling and painting walls and resealing both bathtubs. 

It's been an education.

Several trips were devoted to matching existing paint and many more involved advice and additional supplies. 

In the end, it wasn't very difficult. 

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